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Boy Kills Giant Hog
Written by Jonas Ivo   
Friday, May 25 2007

I don't know about you but that isn't a damn hog that is a freakish hellbeast. I am glad that hillbilly took care of business.

 MONTGOMERY, Ala. (AP) - Hogzilla is being made into a horror movie. But the sequel may be even bigger: Meet Monster Pig. An 11-year-old Alabama boy used a pistol to kill a wild hog his father says weighed a staggering 1,051 pounds and measured 9-feet-4 from the tip of its snout to the base of its tail. Think hams as big as car tires.

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Hunting Tips

I'm friggin' pissed! 

 

Someone ate my last half gallon of vanilla bean ice cream that I had in the sub-zero walk-in freezer. It was clearly labeled "TINY WIGHT's VANILLA BEAN ICE CREAM, ASSHOLE. NO TOUCHY." 

 

I just got back from the grocery store with all these sundae fixin's and now I'm standing here with MUD on my face. Whoever took that ice cream, I swear to you "I will punch your fucking lights out".


 

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Jinx Jubilee
Special Powers:: - Transforming: When aggravated, Jinx turns into the carnivorous dinosaur of his choice. - Confusion: Jinx can get so confused that he will baffle you and cause you to tip over. - Rampage (only used when transformation would be inappropriate, like at comic book store or his mom's house): Jinx Jubilee gets wicked mad when people make fun of good movies (like if their trying to be a jerk or something), especially low budget horror movies. He's not very strong, but he could probably sever your head if you made fun his favorite movies. * When in dire circumstances, Jubilee will lie like a terd-burgling pooch and use unnecessary amounts of sarcasm, this does not always (or usually) withdraw him from those dire circumstances.

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